This is where the numbers don't go in order....



(sometimes) You keep asking "whats wrong whats wrong.." sometimes im like, SHADDUP JUST LET ME CRY BITCH.



HAPPY 21st MONTHLYVERSARY,
BEST FRIEND<3
i love you

Lets pretend baby
That you've just met me
And Ive never seen you before
Ill tell all my friends
That I think you're staring
And you say the same to yours

And oh, well dance around it all night
And then Ill follow you outside
And try to open up my mouth
And nothing comes out right

And I wanna fall in love with you again
I don't have to try
Its so easy
Who needs to pretend?
But because its so funny
Lets just think about it, honey
Lets just fall in love again

Ill call you in three days
Not too soon, not too late
And Ill ask your roommate if you're home
You call me on Thursday
And well hang out all day
Then fall asleep on the phone

And oh, Ill hold your hand when we drive
And well lose track of all the time
And well tell everyone
That we ain't never felt so alive

And I wanna fall in love with you again
I don't have to try
Its so easy
Who needs to pretend?
But because its so funny
Lets just think about it, honey
Lets just fall in love again

Well fall disgustingly fast
And well stop hanging out with friends
And they'll be so offended

And I wanna fall in love with you again
I don't have to try
Its so easy
Who needs to pretend?
But because its so funny
Lets just think about it, honey
Lets just fall in love again
Lets just fall in love again

aL

FOR THE RECORD,  you know i FUCKING hate your FUCKING job. if your job was a person, id stab it. a million times. This is one thing, i never regretted saying. ever. not then not now. and you know why. i dont even have to explain why. i know why you have to keep it and i understand and all, but im just saying.. i dont know how you stand it, but I HATE YOUR FUCKING JOB.

k, goodnight. im done ranting. ow, stomach still hurts. time to eat my meds.

Hey, so i had this strong urge of wanting to blog the other day. But i was so lazy, and i didnt. Now, i just cant seem to remember what i wanted to blog about. So im just gonna do a few updates about whats been going on. but dont expect much.. cos im not really in the mood to blog..

1) Ive been reading LOTS OF SERIES BOOKS. I LOVE THEM ALL. ( Starcrossed, Awake at Dawn, Fallen) Three of the series that im currently following. I LOVE THEM. I have a bad feeling about this though, cos my imagination is starting to run wild. And we all know how when i start to fantasize too much about all that stuff, things go wrong.. Well, we'll see(:

2) IM GOING TO EUROPE IN DECEMBER. I KNOW RIGHT. SCREAM WITH ME. All my life ive been dreaming of the victorian eras and ive read all about their history and stuff, read stories that dated back to their olden day cultures. It'll be a dream come true to travel to Europe. I'll be going to Italy, Switzerland and Paris then ill be heading over to London. Im so psyched. This will definitely not be my first and last trip there i hope!(: i'll be going with netta's family.. and ahmad would be tagging along too(: im so excited! If this trip turns out well(which i know it will) I'll definitely be going back there on my own to soak myself up in European culture. Maybe go on to SPAIN and GREECE<3

okay, so exams are over and holidays are coming, but ive made a promise to myself that this holiday, i'll be doing as much studying as having fun. To prep for next year. its no joke next year. NO WAY IS THIS GIRL GONNA WASTE HER TIME. IM GOING TO GRADUATE AND WITH GOOD GRADES.

So you'll be hearing from me more often (i hope) because im much more free now... till then, ciao!

a little something that i felt describes how im feeling at the moment as im lost in my own little world...


love,
me(:

Hey!
So Ahmad told me i havent been blogging for the longest time. so yea.. HI!(:
This is just something i was thinking about while in the shower just now(okay, awkward) but its true.
So before i went to shower, mad and and i were talking about how we want our wedding to be like and stuff( okay, other people who are reading this, this might sound a little too cheesy so i suggest, if you wanna save yourself from vomitting, please STOP reading here.)

okay, yeah, wedding. its a little too soon but you know me, i LOVE WEDDINGS. and who better to talk about it with than my boyfriend right?
So we were planning and i got really excited like i have this list already. hahahaha. and then i realised, i really wanna see us together in the future. I know we've been having rough times together, but through it all, whenever i was thinking about my future, i knew he was in it. (regardless of how pissed i am at him) he would always be there, when i think about my future. Like i cant NOT see him there.
So i was thinking to myself, i guess its only gonna be like what 5-6 years before we get married ( insyaallah) (:(:(: thats thinking really far ahead but if you think about it, thats not really long form now. it made me realize how much i want him to be there in my life, and so i guess i want to fight for us. He'll probably be really happy when he sees this cos i usually tell him that i dont wanna marry him or like some shit abut us not ending up together cos i dont like him enough. hahahaha.

So yeah, whatever comes our way, i guess im willing to fight. (TRY)
cos i really want us to work out. its really not gonna be easy and from the past few months, i know its gonna be crazy hard.
but if we're meant to be.. then we're meant to be right?
(and im really hoping we're meant to be!!!)

hehehe. youre probably thinking" omg, shes so sweet, who is she and what has she done to my girlfriend "
Dont worry(: im just slowly growing up and slowly maturing everyday(: ( so hopefully, my tolerance and understanding level.. will get better)

love,
aL

Zain "Zayn" Jawaad Malik is Mine. M.I.N.E. MINE.
i dont like to share sorry. and besides. i told you about it. so i called dibs first.
dont act all wushy like you know him so well. pft, im a bitch when it comes to things like this but hey. im a girl. its what i do.



I LOVE YOU ZAYNNNNNNNN<3

My eyes may stray but baby, only you can make me stay ~


Hehe. k random much. ANYWAY. gosh, i havent been posting in the longest time! So much has been going on its insane. Went for dinner with Mad, Rai and Cat just now, we were talking about everything.. haha. its so fun to talk to them, their hilarious!! Before that, i had ELITE TEENZ rehearsals. ohmygod, WE ARE ON A ROLL BABEH. Having rehearsals everyday is hella tiring but it sure is fun! See when it comes to rehearsing dances like this i wouldnt mind. i could stay in the studio the WHOLE FRIGGIN DAY if you asked me to, for dances like this. BUT NO WAY IN HELL will i have the discipline to stay for so long if its for ballet or modern. Our auditions for the KPOP thingum is coming up! SHIT. im actually quite nervous though im not a big fan of kpop.

These two weeks are arts fest weeks so school has been starting at 9 and ending at 1! WOOHOO. AWESOME SHIZ. i could get used to that man. But have to admit, it makes me really lazy. I cant wait to gt arts fest over and done with, no more rehearsals on saturday mornings! YES! after this its gonna be CHIONG all the way for acads. Need to do well if i even want to apply for poly. Speaking of which, i might want to transfer out of SOTA. MIGHT. I dont know, im still not sure. I really wanna do events but there are so many things to consider! It has come to the point in time where you have to make your own decisions, what is best for you. Your parents arent gonna be the ones to choose for you, you have to choose for yourself, its scary but exhilarating at the same time. Its like, my life is finally starting.. kinda.

This past few months have been one roller coaster ride for both mad and i. Really, its been tough. He pisses me off so much sometimes, i just feel like not talking to him at all when i see him.. but as soon as he leaves me, like when we go home, i miss him.. so its been like that for the past few months. like a love-hate relationship. HAHAHAHA. But i kinda expected it, what with his amount of work and stress, and my school stuff and all... arguments are BOUND to happen. Its a good thing we always make up. But thats not good isit? if we have too many arguments... i dont know. I have just been super moody lately i dont know why. it pisses me off so much. i know its not an excuse but.. i cant help it. i REALLY CANT); There are certain things i wish to say to you but its hard, maybe when the time is right, i will. but i have to admit, baby, being with you for the past 1 year has been really... amazing. Amazing not in a, " WOW , our relationship is perfect " kinda way but more of a.. " we went through so much and we pulled through together " i think thats the amazing part. Growing up together, its what makes us stronger.(: I dont regret anything so far b, even if sometimes i feel like pushing you to the middle of the road, i still wanna be with you at the end of the day. I guess thats what love is all about, right? I know you're gonna piss me off more and so am i in the next few months , but as long as you show me that you love me,( dont kaopei here please, i have to say this but sometimes, you dont show me okay, see bet you didnt know i felt this way, HAH )  i'll stay for as long as you want me too(: aiyo, cheesy but its true. Cos ( though i hate to admit it ) nobody knows me like you do <3

P. S. The sucky part of our relationship has started, the part where we have to focus on everything else except the both of us.. so please if i start to lose faith, dont let me go.. of course, i will play my part and put effort as well, but please kay, dont.

P. P. S. Since i cant change your mind about getting a bike, and youre going to get it anyway even if i keep cursing you, you should just go ahead and get it, im not exactly happy about it but i'll live with it, as long as you keep your word and promise you'll stay safe, i'll try to be nice. Just dont push it and constantly talk about it cos you know i already dont like the idea. THANX.
love you..

JULY is crazy but i have a feeling AUGUST is gonna be worse.. ohwell, suck it up and move on, thats life right? We all will survive somehow(:

aL

what a stupid stupid thing to do. April, this time dont blame anyone else for your act of foolishness.


aL